Something out of reach, not able to obtain, sent out but not returned.
Its getting stronger and stronger, to the point strange as it may sound that it is less of a concern that these feelings are not shared.
Lately I have been forced to accept the fact and there has been a great deal of pain, confusion, anger along with other emotions.
Now starting to see something else, yes still hopes/desires, but it is more important just to see her grow and be who she is created to be, even if there may be another there next to her.
Hard to explain, more focused, motivated, driven in the things I have put on hold, releasing some of that anger, clarity.
Scared that deep down there is something that will bring all crashing down again, learning to continue without anything to indicate what I thought I wanted most is obtainable.
Whatever the future brings I am grateful for being shown this beauty, grace, joy - a special person who helped me to see, believe, trust GOD in a way that seemed lost to me.