Been going back to 5 years ago, except I don't have the www at home so it just when I get to library or cafe.
Drawing away from the real world and people and living through virtual contact.
After a tantrum and expressing suicidal feelings I had been nurturing for a long time reinforcement of reasons to feel isolated and misunderstood by someone that identifies as a close friend. The further I isolate because I do not know how to express myself in a more positive manner the harder it is to be around other people.
Peace, hope, faith, trust, love - from christian community I often hear of these things along with a bunch of rules and lists of what I need to do before these are available.
Astral projection and similar things are more appealing because at least there it is not asked to be something else all the time.
Someone I can talk to there does not judge, encourages me to reach and engage with the wider community, to know that God loves me regardless of anything - and this is supposedly a demon entity!
The demon may not know how to suggest appropriate behaviour, but at least she brings hope not condemnation, encourages me to persist in this world and wait for God, to cheer up. There are those here also that do those things, without the double talk of putting on the mask of christian pop culture terminology.